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 The whole house is sleeping right now but me. I can't sleep because I'm remembering back a year ago tonight, I woke up in labor and laid in bed thinking, "Well, this is it. I'm about to have a baby in Africa and there's nothing I can do to stop it!" Going into labor and delivering a baby were not new to me, but doing it in Africa definitely was. And even without that variable, there is something so exhilarating about labor and delivery that each time you do it, you feel like you are experiencing it for the first time. So, a year ago I laid in bed enduring the very early contractions of labor, waiting with great anticipation of what August 18th would bring. And now, I lay in bed remembering all the details from that sweet day and all the days that have followed. With each passing day our family has fallen more in love with our little Tessa.
There is something so sweet and unique about Tessa's first year. Much of this has to do with the fact that she is experiencing life within a large family. She doesn't just have a mom and dad who are crazy about her. She has two big brothers and a sister that have given her an abundance of love and attention. And in turn, Tessa has given them a whole lot of grace! And watching this has been satisfying and fulfilling for me and Mark.
Tessa's first year is also unique because at two months old she saw her first lions. Come on, how many two month old babies can say that! But what really made that month special was the fact that her Gigi and Uncle John and Aunt Bekka traveled across the ocean to see her. Anticipating the moment when my mother would meet my baby daughter was overwhelmingly exciting. My mom was present at Luke and Connor's birth, as well as at the airport for the arrival of Lydia Jane. All year long I have lived within the tension of being terribly sad that my family has not been present for Tessa's first year, and being extremely appreciative for the joy that I've experienced anticipating them seeing her and being with her. Before, sharing moments like that with family was meaningful, but very normal and expected. Now, they are treasured.
Probably the most significant way Tessa's first year is unique to her (and our family) is the way that she has experienced life with Ugandans. Our Ugandan friends have partnered with our family to love her and raise her this year, and I am truly thankful for the role they have played in Tessa's life. I especially am thankful for Tom. I have never experienced someone loving one of my children the way that Tom has loved Tessa. The Lord has created a sweet bond between the two of them that at many times has been more visible than the bond she has with me! You would think this would make a mother sad (or jealous!), but I have found so much joy in it. These early times spent with Tom in our home will shape Tessa, and all of our children, in ways we can't fully anticipate.
I must confess there have been many moments of homesickness where I would have given anything to fly home so Tessa could be near my family. Many tears were shed this year. I now know what it means for my heart to literally ache. But despite this, I praise God for Tessa's first year and the ways it is set apart from my other children. I'm thankful for how I've been content to simply hibernate with her at home, enjoying all the first moments of her life. And I'm thankful for the experience of raising a child in a different culture, among a different people. It has challenged me and it has taught me.
Happy Birthday Tessa Marie Manry! May you grow to reflect the beautiful qualities in the two godly women whom you were named after. And may God develop within you a love and appreciate for the place of your birth.
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Lori's Closet 
